


Shake it Off

by ChloeNicole1912



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Drabble, Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2015-01-13
Packaged: 2018-03-07 11:51:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3173058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChloeNicole1912/pseuds/ChloeNicole1912
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(A little thing I wrote to help with writers block. Do NOT take it seriously.) </p><p>Because Tauriel and Taylor Swift is a match made in heaven, even if it doesn't keep with her "I am terrifying and could crush you with a glance" reputation....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shake it Off

It was a big day for Kili. After nearly a year, Fili was finally in town, and about to see his new apartment, which he shared with his new girlfriend, Tauriel. He was, of course more than a little nervous, as anyone would be, but Kili had more cause than most. You see, Tauriel was not your average girl. Not only was she a good head taller than Kili, but she was… well a unique individual. 

“So tell again how you two met?” Fili asked, sipping his coffee as they approached the building where Kili lived. Kili blushed at the memory.   
“Well, I was walking back from archery practice, it was pretty late, and getting dark so y’know it was pretty scary.” He started, turning onto the front path of the building, “So anyway, out of no-where these three massive guys come out and demand my wallet and phone, and I’m totally freaked because these guys are HUGE, and really rough looking. I refuse, obviously, because I need those, and then they start rounding on me, and one of them is about to punch me and then BAM there she is. I’m not even kidding Fi, she just came out of no-where and was beating these guys down, like something out of a Kung Fu movie! Within minutes she’s singlehandedly got these guys at her mercy and cuffed. Turns out shes a cop, and has been tracking these guys for a while. Something about being part of the dangerous Spider gang network or something.” Fili let out a low whistle, clearly impressed, as his brother continued. “So I’m sitting there kind of scared of this woman because she literally just took out these three guys and when back-up arrived and took them away she offers to take me for coffee because apparently I look a little shaken up, and she’d just come off duty, and y’know, unbelievably hot and very scary lady offers you coffee, you say yes, and I guess it kind of went from there…” 

Fili shook his head, grinning. “Suppose it makes sense… You’re so bloody hopeless, you need some sort of warrior princess to look after you! Kinda scared to meet this girl, she sounds like she could whoop my arse into next week!”

Kili laughed, and nodded. “You have no idea! Fully trained cop, keeps a gun in her room, trained in kickboxing and karate, and has a stare that can instill fear into the heart of any man… I mean don’t get me wrong, once you get to know her, shes lovely, but damn, shes still a little scary…”

They had reached the door of Kili’s apartment, and Fili took a deep breath, genuinely slightly terrified of what lay ahead, if Tauriel was truly as scary as his brother described. But literally nothing could have prepared him for what he saw when the door opened.

The woman in their living room was about as far away as you could get from a cool, composed warrior. She was tall, slender, and beautiful, sure enough but...not what he expected. She was dressed in an oversized sweater, patterned leggings, and her firey red hair will pulled up in a messy ponytail, with tendrils falling out. She had her headphones in, her eyes closed, and was dancing around with the vacuum cleaner, singing at the top of her lungs. 

“BUT THE HATERS GUNNA HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE BABY IM JUST GUNNA SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE” Apparently she was a Taylor Swift Fan. Each “shake” by a shimmy, or a butt wiggle, and Kili blinked, mouth open in shock.   
“YOU COULD HAVE BEEN GETTING DOWN TO THIS. SICK. BEAT” Tauriel continued, still vacuuming the floor, “So My ex man bought his new girlfriend and shes like OH MY GOD!!!!” 

The last two lines weren’t actually sung, more shrieked, as she finally caught sight of the pair, who were gaping at her from the doorway. Her face turned bright red, and she froze for a few moments, the awkward silence filling the small room. 

“You werent meant to be back until five…” Tauriel said sheepishly, turning the vacuum off, breaking the silence. Fili simply laughed, and extended a hand, which the blushing woman took.   
“Yeah I caught an earlier train, sorry about that!” he grinned, and decided he liked this girl. Yes, she may be incredibly scary and trained to kill, but she was also a massive dork, so really she was perfect for his brother.   
"I'm Fili! Kí's brother!" He said, giving the poor girl a winning smile, and she desperately tried to redeem herself.   
"I'm Tauriel, but then, you probably knew that! Um... Excuse me, I just need to, um..." She gestured to her clothes and smiled apologetically. "I should change!" 

After she had vanished into what was presumably her and Kili's room, Fili turned to his brother with a massive grin on his face. "Oh yes, very scary!" He teased, as his brother shoved him playfully. 

Fili decided that this would be a very interesting stay after all... And that his brother certainly knew how to pick 'em!


End file.
